Episode 37: Survivor Story: Blessings Hidden in the Moments with Elle Gargano
We survivors understand the world in a different way. We have found that the worst of times shape you in a fundamental way like nothing else can. The silver linings are plentiful. Building a life after injury that holds these new perspectives in the forefront takes courage and an openness to become something new. Elle Gargano has taken her experiences after surviving a mass shooting to shape her life into the one she wants it to be. Recovering from a brain injury doesn’t mean you get over it. It means you learn how to find joy every day, accepting and incorporating all parts of yourself. You have the power to be you and make an impact in this world. Live Brave! @brave_the_label
In this episode:
Elle survived a gunshot to the head suffered on October 1, 2017 at a country music festival mass shooting in Las Vegas
As horrific as the shooting was, Elle found silver linings; “blessings hidden in the moments” (6:54). Goodness is there even in the worst times
At a time when people were faced with saving themselves, complete strangers helped her, her friend, and others get out
During your time on earth, the most important thing about it is the connections you make with others. Things don’t matter; it's the people in your life that give it value and meaning.
Near-death experiences give a valuable and life-changing perspective that others may not understand.
A testament to the power of good: complete strangers helped Elle and her friend make it out of the venue and took Elle to the hospital
Making connections with other survivors of the event is really hard. Everyone is in a different place with processing it. It can be very overwhelming to revisit the trauma.
Elle needed a craniectomy to remove the bullet fragments and a piece of her skull. A few weeks later she needed a cranioplasty (synthetic skull insertion). She had side effects of hydrocephalus which is a build up of fluid in her brain that eventually required a third surgery to insert a shunt.
Loss of self and lack of identity after brain injury-- That feeling of not identifying with your past self and interests. Not knowing yourself anymore--your interests and abilities are different post-injury. You have to relearn who you are after injury.
Changing from your previous over-achieving self to someone with a different level of performance is not only hard on you but it changes the roles you play within your social contexts. Family, friends, and yourself all have to adjust to the new you and figure out the new role you play. It is hard on everyone.
Joe Borges ep. 30: Before our injuries we were caterpillars in the dirt but after injury we are butterflies soaring. Yet everyone expects us to still be caterpillars.
The adjustment to being home
Her initial mentality post-injury was filled with gratitude for being alive but as time has gone on she has learned many things about herself and dealing with trauma.
Elle’s career path changed post-injury from a conventional corporate path to one where she could be more mindful of her needs with a controlled pace and a focus on helping others.
Elle started a business: Brave the Label
Brave the Label
Elle’s company:
When she was thinking of names she considered what she wants people to embody while wearing her clothes: Bravery, a feeling of empowerment, confidence, you can do anything you put your mind to, you have it in you!!
The business is helping others while helping Elle regain her sense of purpose, accomplishment, and meaning.
It's a clothing company of hand tie-dyed sets of athleisure wear
10% of all proceeds go to mental health initiatives!!
Brave the Label is a community, you are a part of something bigger when you are wearing her clothes
Having structure and things you can do to contribute to your household helps with recovery as it gives you back some purpose
Having a business has helped Elle build the life that she wants
Words of wisdom to end with
If something feels wrong ask for help. Don’t stop until you feel like you are in a better place with it. You have to be your own advocate or find someone that will advocate for you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
Sometimes the help doesn’t come in the form you think it will. Family and friends may not have the tools and tips to help you process and recover
Even if you aren’t ready for that first step of seeing a therapist, it is worth taking it. You don’t have to suffer in silence or suffer alone. There are people that want to be there and help you.
It is a journey. The way you feel one day is totally different than the next. You will have ups and downs, that’s ok.
This is a part of your life but it isn’t your whole life. It is not something you get over because it is a part of you. You can still enjoy life and have many interests. PTSD, depression, and injury do not need to become you--there is still an enjoyable life to be had!!
Links to any resources mentioned:
Listen to Joe Borges ep. 30: Crawling out of the Dirt,
Instagram: @joesorocks
Follow Elle on Instagram @ellegargano
Brave the Label
Follow Brave the Label on Instagram @brave_the_label
Website www.wearebravethelabel.com
Links to any research or studies mentioned
Any quotes that might be worth having (but no pressure to have any if it just doesn't make sense)
HELP US SPREAD THE WORD!
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